flatsound:

shout outs to ppl who actually take selfies in public. i don’t know why we mock them, that’s a level of confidence and not giving a fuck that i want to achieve one day

(via akanedee)


willsicott:

tuxedoandex:

ugly:

What do you call the security guards outside Samsung shops?

what

Guardians of the Galaxy

(via spideypool)


modestmgmtofficial:

identical twins have so much power tbh last year my lab partner steve came in with pierced ears and everyone was like whoa steve when did u get them pierced and he was like i’ve had them for 3 years. i’m not steve. and he just sat down and started taking notes. the next day steve came in and was like did u guys see my brother jake yesterday lmao we switched schools

(via erens-cum)


tomathin:

when you accidentally bump into the president

image

(via nouis-narry)


lilreem:

me: come sleep overguy: yesme: sike *friendzoned*

lilreem:

me: come sleep over
guy: yes
me: sike *friendzoned*

(via aprils-shower)


ezekestiel:

voldemo:

voldemo:

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

its like ive never seen herbivore

i sighed so loud my mom asked me if i was okay and she’s two rooms away

(via aprils-shower)


pizzaight:

shutsman:

WHAT SPORT IS THIS?

my sport

pizzaight:

shutsman:

WHAT SPORT IS THIS?

my sport

(via feelmycucumber)


I think we’ve officially reached that annoying time in the year where it’s sweater weather in the morning, but by midday, if you wear a sweater, you die from heatstroke.

(via akanedee)


trouserweasel:

damn right I did

trouserweasel:

damn right I did

(via roosterteethpjoh)


kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails

(via akanedee)